That’s right, 5 days from now I will be moving into my college dorm for my freshmen year. It is exciting, nerve-wracking, and overall completely terrifying. It is such a huge step in my life and I am kind of ready for it? But kind of not at the same time. It is at this moment where I have to rely on all of the life skills my parents taught me, where I have to lean on God more than ever, and where I just have to trust in Him and myself that I am going to be okay. It has been a long road coming, but I cannot believe it’s getting down to the end where my mom hands off the baton and sets me free. I keep trying to tell myself “hey, it’s okay” and to hone in the anxiety, I have to keep telling myself that she will miss me but it’s okay if we don’t talk 24/7. I have to keep reminding myself that I’m an adult now and there’s responsibility. I am not a kid anymore. It is so scary. This post is short, but trust me; my list of worries is a mile long. I can’t wait to see how my dorm room turns out though! 🙂
When life is good, I post less and less, even if I do take lots of pictures. That’s where I found myself this past week. I spent the week with my brother and his family about an hour and a half away. I took so many pictures but we were so busy that I didn’t have much time to post any! Because of that, I am going to share some here today!!! I already miss them so much.
This is the best that I’ve felt in a long time and being an aunt is so rewarding.
This Spring Break has mostly been about resting and quite literally taking a break from all the stress from school. So far my family has gone out to see the new Beauty and the Beast movie in the actual movie theater and I painted my room my favorite color!!! It’s been great, but I don’t want to go back to school!
“Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted” Matthew 5:4
I am so sorry for being absent for the past month. It has been a long month indeed. I last wrote a post about Christmas and how great of a holiday it was. Oh, it was. And it was a great New Years with my mom watching movies and drinking sparkling cider. We toasted and rung in the new year with the ball drop, everyone sending “Happy New Years!!!” texts. It was a very happy time.
Our world went spiraling downwards on Wednesday, January 11th when my mom came home and told me that my dad was dead. Those two words that she said to me did not sound real in my ears. “Daddy’s dead”. No. He can’t be. I cried and cried. As rocky as my relationship was with him, I loved him. I still love him.
He’s not going to be there to see me graduate. He’s not going to be at my wedding. He’s not going to see my children. He’s going to miss out on so much. And that hurts.
I need prayers for comfort and healing. Even after two and a half weeks I’m still in shock about him being gone. He’s really gone. I’m never going to hear him say “I love you” or get a hug from him ever again. I’m never going to have him text me telling me about the sunset that night again. He’s gone and it breaks my heart. Nothing can ever prepare you for that news. Nothing can.
I miss you daddy.
First off, I would like to say hello again! It’s been a long time since I’ve written a blog post, and a lot has happened between now and then. I guess I don’t know how to word things into posts sometimes, or sometimes the thought slips, or sometimes I just plain put it off. Life happens. That is what I keep writing in my bullet journal every time I miss a chunk of time. “Life happens.” I realize looking back at my previous posts I have only posted 5 blog posts since I went on summer break…
My summer break was full and fun, boring at times, but it was a pretty good summer. To list most of the things I did, here they are (with possible pictures available):
Went to Lake of the Woods for Memorial Day
Hung out with 2 of my friends
- Botanical Gardens
- Post is here.
- Coffee date
- Kroger, TCBY, & the library
Went to several Friday night live concerts with my grandpa
Went to Indiana Dunes (2x)
- Spontaneous trip with aunt & mom
- Post is here.
- Planned trip with my mom, my siblings, & my mom’s friend/her kids
Saw fireworks (2x)
- Patriotic Pops concert
- Post is here.
- Three Rivers Festival
Went to Cedar Point
Celebrated my birthday
Adopted a new kitten (his name is Oliver and we got him on Salem’s “adoptaversary”)
Went to Zesto with my grandpa
Went to the zoo
- I will make a separate post for this because there are so many pictures from that day.
Babysat my nieces & nephew (& dog niece)
My summer was filled to the brim with good memories. Now I hope my last year of high school is just as great.
Talk to you soon! (I promise)
It just occurred to me today that there is only 6 days of school left this year.
6 days left of my junior year. :- (
6 days until we don’t have the seniors around… :- (
I cannot believe how fast this year has gone. It feels like it was just January and winter break and the semi formal and prom… prom! And now there are only 6 days left. I cannot believe that I will be a big bad senior next year… the time for college applications, scholarships, and the last hoorah until we all go our separate ways. It doesn’t feel like 2017 should be this close. It always felt so out of reach… and it’s literally a year away – well, half a year. But shhhh, I don’t want to talk about that.
I’ve already taken a few finals, I have one on Thursday, a few on Monday, Tuesday, and on our last day Wednesday. I’m so not ready but at the same time, I’m ready!!!
These are just some recent captures from the past 2 months @ school…
I’ll probably come back once we are out of school for the SUMMER!!
I cannot believe it is April already. This year has been flying past and I still haven’t caught up to it yet. I can’t believe in just over a month my junior year will be done already… and the seniors will be off going their separate ways. They’re already graduating from Vincennes this month! I can’t believe it. It’s just unbelievable. I’m basically going to be a senior in high school come May. Wow. Never in a million years did 2017 feel so close. All throughout my schooling 2017 felt out of reach… I can’t believe it will already be my graduation year. I also go to my prom this year… April 23rd. I’ve got my dress, jewelry, ticket… I only need the shoes. It feels so real. I can’t believe it’s happening. It’s so exciting.
Peeling away from school, this Spring Break has been just what I’ve needed. It’s already Tuesday night and I just don’t want school to come yet! I am loving the sleeping in. Once Spring Break is over, the school year will fly by even faster. I will enjoy my break, thank you… haha.
April is also Parkinson’s disease awareness month. As some of you know, my grandma had Parkinson’s disease for almost 32 years until it caught up to her this year. She was a champ :’) For those of you who don’t know what Parkinson’s disease is, it is defined by Merriam-Webster as “a chronic progressive neurological disease chiefly of later life that is linked to decreased dopamine production in the substantia nigra and is marked especially by tremor of resting muscles, rigidity, slowness of movement, impaired balance, and a shuffling gait” It truly is a heartbreaking disease to watch someone you love go through.
I also can’t believe that my sister turns the big 10 this month! Double digits! She’s as sassy as ever and she’s got a heart of gold (when she wants), and I just can’t believe she’s already going to be in the double digits. Like, woah.
Oh, and we can’t forget the amazing pictures I’ve already taken in these short 5 days in April already! ; -) By the way, the first blue sky, white clouds picture & the snow on the windshield were taken on the same day!
So hello April!